What is lol, no?
An experiment in sensemaking and finding a life worth living. I use psychology, sociology, and cognitive science to unravel anecdotes and tales from my time as a software engineering leader and turn them into actionable frameworks for everyone who comes after me.
More than just an advice column, lol, no is really about what Christopher Alexander calls “an unfolding”: the process of incremental self-discovery where one designs a life fit for them by prioritizing moving towards “the good” (rather than focusing solely on moving away from “the bad.”).
There is a crisis of purposelessness forming in Big Tech; I’m no Marxist but the alienation of labor is alive and well. In the space of 6 months, I had 10+ conversations with different people who feel tired, bored, and estranged from the work that occupies nearly half their waking hours, and cannot see a way through the emotional storm cloud.
I do not think the answer is to just “work somewhere else” or “care less.” For many, myself included, software feels like a true calling. We are creators at heart and the digital world makes the distance between “idea” and “reality” near-zero.
For me, work is sacred. I learned what it meant to feel powerless watching a parent succumb to addiction, seeing the life we’d built disappear, and being unable to stop any of it. Work was my redemption: an outlet where I could build something solid and lasting with my own two hands, of my own will and volition, and accumulate the wealth and power to protect the ones I love. The self-worth, self-confidence, and self-actualization that accompanied achievement at work saved me many times over. Now, I set out to offer that same redemption to anyone who will have it.
Where did all this come from?
lol, no started in 2020 as a semi-private space for me to share advice and lessons with my closest friends and colleagues.
As readership ballooned, I separated out my management coaching (creating Manager’s Craft) and personal essays on life (lol, no) to try and preserve some nebulous concept of the “voice of the blog.”
After 3 years, 57 clients, 220 coaching sessions, and 17 articles it became clear that what resonated most with readers and clients was the irreverent, shoot-from-the-hip, no-holds style cultivated in my personal essays. This shouldn’t have really been a surprise. The whole notion of work/life balance always irked me because it implied life doesn’t happen at work…but you spend nearly half your waking hours there so what gives!? Now I’m bringing it all together under one roof.
Where do I begin?
These will give you a feel for what happens here and are some of my most shared posts:
Who is Jim Hughes?
Life-long software engineer and budding technical executive. Two successful startups, one failed academic career, and peaking flailing as a Fortune 100 VPE.
I’ve oscillated between writing code and managing people my whole career, because I believe you need to understand the machine to steer the ship. From kernel-level work on Windows to optimizing exabytes of data at Google, I’ve worked on everything from platform infrastructure to end-user products.
My happy place is the intersection of product, engineering, and business—guiding my teams through the broader ecosystem to achieve commercial success and build things they can be proud of.
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What do I get with a paid subscription?
In addition to all of my free posts…
Join the Community: ability to comment and participate in chat discussions.
Read the Build journal: raw, unfiltered thoughts and observations trying to build my 3rd startup, and more importantly, build the life I really want to live and getting off the corporate roller coaster after nearly 19 years.
Preview Book Chapters: I will release drafts of select chapters and passages from my forthcoming book on Engineering Management (ETA: 2028).
Hard Truths: my subscribers form a small, self-selecting audience with which I can be more honest and direct, sharing the more biting and revelatory experiences from my journey from freelancer to VP with a whole lot less filtering and obfuscation.
Become a Superfan to get 1:1 and async coaching
The highest tier of subscribers get a free trial of my management coaching services in the form of a 1-hr one-on-one and access to chat/SMS me directly for on-the-fly personalized advice. My coaching practice focuses on line managers (M1) and managers-of-managers (M2) but I also have a couple executive clients as well. Right now I’m carrying ~20 long-term clients and may need to alter this deal if it’s more popular than I planned…so get in while this sweet deal is still on offer 😊
Client Testimonies
“I wanted to thank you personally for all of your support over the past many months. […] I believe your transparent guidance, feedback, directly led to my success and ability to land my L7 promo. Thank you!”
“Thank you so much for your invaluable mentorship. Your guidance on team build strategy and management skills has been incredibly impactful. I particularly appreciate how you helped me shift from tactics to strategy, enabling me to approach leadership with a clearer, more holistic vision.”
“One of the most productive hours I’ve spent in almost 5 years at Google!”
“Jim was exactly what I have been missing from my work, someone who really understands the position I’m in and having clear tips on how to solve them. I came away with clear actionable items such as foicusing on what I need and communicating them. Also, he did great layout different paths to consider where I hadn’t seen the options as clearly as I do now. Also I generally feel more solid if following my intuition. I have tactical ways to increase my visibility such as writing more emails.”
What to expect in our coaching calls
The core of great management is having a vision for the future + a strategy for how to get there, and creating an environment so that strategy can unfold successfully. Leaders work on the system not in the system and I will help you make the all-important jump from tactics to strategy...from micro to macro--understanding the whole system and creating/shaping organizational culture. Some of the common topics I coach on include:
how to weather the crazy storm that is having far-too-many-reports while somehow staying hands-on and technical
naturalizing in a new role/team/organization
managing up and winning over your boss
building credibility and improving your reputation across the org, establishing a peer network
productive use and application of power / formal authority while preserving team autonomy / egalitarianism
using org design (25-800 reports) and process design as a tool to shape behaviors and create outcomes
understanding and acting on feedback
influencing, driving results, and change management at the org-, SVP-, and company-level
understanding the defining traits/demands/skills that differentiate the different levels of management and identifying the leadership role that is right for you
building a leadership bench, mentoring and developing high-potential talent, growing staff+ SWEs
difficult performance management cases and topgrading your organization
My coaching is not limited to “work” topics, and having had to navigate my fair share of ups and downs I am well equipped to help you think through problems like:
overcoming feelings of inadequacy/imposter syndrome
managing stress and recovery from/preventing burnout
working through family crisis; maintaining performance even while grieving
finding connection and friendship even when being a manager feels so isolating and alone
dealing with regret, mid-life crisis, and feeling that you’ve “wasted your life”
Inquiries
jim [at] lolno.com
